I never felt so alone and helpless... but my prayers were quickly answered. Zarina (my beloved wife, for those who doesn't know) arrived at around 11:00 in the morning. I just could not describe in words how relieved I was to finally see the face of my loved one - my source of strength. We hugged for what seems like an eternity and both cried in relief. With her beside me now; I could take anything! Thanks to PETRONAS who flew her in!
The MRI was done soon after and in the meantime Zarina went to check in into her hotel nearby the hospital. I was not so much in pain now so the procedure went effortlessly.
Later in the day, my doctor came in and dropped the bad news. The MRI showed that there are still some fragments of the disc left in the L4/L5 region and the only way to fix it is to go in again! He explained at length of the bigger risks now in doing a second surgery on GA very close to the first one (only 48 hours apart!) but the risk of not doing it is permanent damage to my nerves. His advice was that it is better to go in quickly before it scarred and fix it once and for all. We had no other choice but to put our whole trust in the doctors and agreed to go ahead with the second operation.
Despite the emotional boost of having Zarina around, I was still very very scared... Nevertheless it was also comforting to see the pouring messages on Facebook and personal messages wishing me for a successful operation and speedy recovery. I also learnt later that many conducted sembahyang hajat for my safety in the operation. My thought of the day was; be close to relatives and friends and be nice to all of them - their kindness, thoughts and prayers will help you in your time of need. I'm so glad and felt so blessed that I have so many of them who genuinely care about me...
They wheeled me in to the OT at about 7 pm that evening while Zarina and Naz were waiting outside. I was already so familiar with the routine by now and thanks to all the prayers and kind wishes - I felt a bit calm. The next thing I know was that I woke up and Zarina was there holding my hand at about 1:00 am the next day. I was told that it was yet another successful surgery. I was so tired that night I drifted to sleep rather easily but my last remaining thoughts was all about looking forward for the next morning to begin my recovery process...!
I woke up the next day, still in the High Dependency Unit ward but with a renewed hope. My calendar alarm on my BlackBerry reminded me that today, 1st December, is my 18th year anniversary working with PETRONAS. Coincidentally, today the hospital dressed me up in the PETRONAS colour! Now, what a way to start!
[Note: I was careful not to 'inappropriately' smile this time]
As I still had the IV line and some other things on me, they wouldn't let me start my physio just yet. I also realized that I was still a bit tired so I wouldn't mind just lying down for the rest of the day. After all, I have Zarina with me now. We spent the time catching up with what had happened in the last few days. It wasn't easy for her as well. Having to leave behind our three kids; she had to make all sorts of arrangements for them and even during the last few hours before catching the flight to London she was still running around sorting out stuffs. Since this is still an open ward, she was asked to leave at 8:00 pm, after the visiting hours had ended. But it is still comforting to know that she is just a walking distance away.
They started my rehab physio from Day 2 after the operation. I'm lucky that my physio therapist is a bubbly and very energetic young lady. I managed to stand up with the aid of the physio therapist and a walking frame but I was stunned when for the first time, I couldn't bring neither one of my foot to step forward! The therapist had to keep reassuring me that this is normal after such major surgeries and I had not lost any of my leg functions. It is just that the nerves are a bit haywire after the second surgery, after having been compressed for long and then being disturbed so much during the process. I too had to keep reassuring myself that I will be able to walk again... soon... I will just have to work hard for it. It might be a long process but I'm determined to make it as quick as I can.
My Facebook status of the day was "Second day of recovery after the second surgery. It seems harder this time to regain strength and flexibility but alhamdulillah the worst is over. I managed to be on my feet for the first time this morning with a walker but still could not make any steps. Thoughts of the day: Count your daily blessings from Allah. Even being able to stand up and take a step with your foot today is a blessing. Imagine those who can't"
This experience has really humbled me as a person...
Despite the emotional boost of having Zarina around, I was still very very scared... Nevertheless it was also comforting to see the pouring messages on Facebook and personal messages wishing me for a successful operation and speedy recovery. I also learnt later that many conducted sembahyang hajat for my safety in the operation. My thought of the day was; be close to relatives and friends and be nice to all of them - their kindness, thoughts and prayers will help you in your time of need. I'm so glad and felt so blessed that I have so many of them who genuinely care about me...
They wheeled me in to the OT at about 7 pm that evening while Zarina and Naz were waiting outside. I was already so familiar with the routine by now and thanks to all the prayers and kind wishes - I felt a bit calm. The next thing I know was that I woke up and Zarina was there holding my hand at about 1:00 am the next day. I was told that it was yet another successful surgery. I was so tired that night I drifted to sleep rather easily but my last remaining thoughts was all about looking forward for the next morning to begin my recovery process...!
I woke up the next day, still in the High Dependency Unit ward but with a renewed hope. My calendar alarm on my BlackBerry reminded me that today, 1st December, is my 18th year anniversary working with PETRONAS. Coincidentally, today the hospital dressed me up in the PETRONAS colour! Now, what a way to start!
[Note: I was careful not to 'inappropriately' smile this time]
As I still had the IV line and some other things on me, they wouldn't let me start my physio just yet. I also realized that I was still a bit tired so I wouldn't mind just lying down for the rest of the day. After all, I have Zarina with me now. We spent the time catching up with what had happened in the last few days. It wasn't easy for her as well. Having to leave behind our three kids; she had to make all sorts of arrangements for them and even during the last few hours before catching the flight to London she was still running around sorting out stuffs. Since this is still an open ward, she was asked to leave at 8:00 pm, after the visiting hours had ended. But it is still comforting to know that she is just a walking distance away.
They started my rehab physio from Day 2 after the operation. I'm lucky that my physio therapist is a bubbly and very energetic young lady. I managed to stand up with the aid of the physio therapist and a walking frame but I was stunned when for the first time, I couldn't bring neither one of my foot to step forward! The therapist had to keep reassuring me that this is normal after such major surgeries and I had not lost any of my leg functions. It is just that the nerves are a bit haywire after the second surgery, after having been compressed for long and then being disturbed so much during the process. I too had to keep reassuring myself that I will be able to walk again... soon... I will just have to work hard for it. It might be a long process but I'm determined to make it as quick as I can.
My Facebook status of the day was "Second day of recovery after the second surgery. It seems harder this time to regain strength and flexibility but alhamdulillah the worst is over. I managed to be on my feet for the first time this morning with a walker but still could not make any steps. Thoughts of the day: Count your daily blessings from Allah. Even being able to stand up and take a step with your foot today is a blessing. Imagine those who can't"
This experience has really humbled me as a person...
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